Keeping your cool and keeping the right attitude.
Compartmentalize!! My husband and I chat all the time about how we want our son to perceive us. How will he view us as parents and people and how will he feel we treated him. Just like every parent out there, we want him to be proud we are his parents, we want him to to feel loved, and feel that we were full of joy when we were with him. However life has a way of getting in the way.
A bad day at work, getting your teeth pulled, argument with friends/family, etc etc. Anything can turn a positive attitude into a negative one. But what do we do to prevent that negative attitude from seeping into our relationships with our childern? The same thing that keeps it from seeping into other relationships, compartmentalize.
When we have a burned, say a bad day at work, treat it almost like a thing and living entity. When we come home, take that burden and put it down for a while. Don’t forget it, just set it down for a couple hours. Even put a time limit, I will smile play and forget for 1 hour. I then can pick up the issues of the bad day, share with my husband etc. I try to make sure when my son sees me, he sees a smile. My husband has a great technique.
Whenever Rudy is feeling down, but needs to provide care and love for our son, he just smiles. It starts out as a creepy forced smile and then turns into a genuine smile. FAKE IT WILL YOU MAKE IT!!
I don’t ever try to forget my problems or negative feelings. I just do my best to remember that I don’t always have to feel bad, sad, frustrated etc. When I am with my son that is the perfect time to put down the burden of negative feelings just for a moment. Share a smile with him, play and laugh. Then, after some time, I can pick up my burden again. Sometimes I feel that I can leave that burden and don’t have to come back to it which is great. Other times, I do have to come back to it pick it up and address. The most important part is that it becomes my option and my baby will always look at me and see a smile.